Few days back, as I went to see Dr Jean regarding why do I have such prolonged cough and that I can even cough out the phlem with blood .. she checkout by her hearing equipment and told me that there are wheezing sound and it comes from two lungs and that my asthma is still not clear.
The moment she said this i felt saddened by the fact that I have to put my jogging/ running practice for the coming shape up distance running on hold. I playfully ask her 'can i exercise this week? I sign up distance running already.' She replied 'No. these are the kind of people who like to do too many things at one time.. and something happen. you should read the newspaper'. Her remarks reminds me of another doctor (whom i seen one week before her at the same clinic) who urged me to sit down and take things at one time.
After which, on that day, 2 July 2007, I came to ask myself why do i want to do so many things at one time.. why do i often felt that if i do one thing less it seems like did not fully occupy the time productively.. why am i so greedy.. what am i trying to prove.. Still young?able to exercise, able to cope with all happenings efficiently.. ? am a capable girl? was thinking very hard.. on the surface i always emphasied on health, yet i compromised it with my stubborness (never want to lose out attitude), anger, lack of sleep, a attitude that get work out easily when i do not get what i want. In the end, my health suffers.. wat an irony..
was on mc last fri 29 june and mon 2 july. while doing my quiet time on 2 july afternoon, i somehow just felt that God is reminding me 'One thing at a time' and let 'First thing be first' ... somehow.. and i feel a let go after which..
after straightening my thoughts about my perspective on job searching and my current job as ccpe, (and also about forgiveness and understanding and patience) which is the root of many of my frustrations and impatience.. i decided i really really need to take my health, my body which is the holy temple of God seriously.. I thought all along i am serious when i am not 100%.. the fact that my asthma comes back really tells..and how i run and swim when i have weezing sound also tells.. somehow i felt relieved and at peace at deciding that the main focus should be my health status.. miraculously when i have that state of mind, i received the job offer .. and honestly i received it with a balance joy.. not an overwhelming joy.. but i think it should be that way..
the truth : '' There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven''
(Ecclesiastes 3:1)
'Lord, thank you so much for the comfort. am still learning. Its so great to rest in you. To know that even the world turns upside down you stand and rock..!! help me always to have this focus and peace in you.. even in my new working environment and in the coming challenges.. let me not be distracted.. Give me the strength to relax, to be balanced, to let go, to forgive and to move forward. and also overcome!! thank you daddy in heaven.'
One thing at a time with the help of Lord Jesus Christ :
1) Health - get healing for asthma and cough, do x-ray.. 8 hr sleep per day, regular check up with doc,
2) Exit interview-
i) speak to kenny (done)
ii) speak to jerome (done)
iii) speak to victor (not yet)
iv) speak to principal (not yet)
v) speak to vp (done)
3) complete all work on hands (not yet)
4) Good handover to ccpe (not yet)
5) Persuade explomo to provide school ccpe asap (not yet)
6) Employment check up (done)
7) buy thumbdrive (not yet)
8) save up all personal items in thumbdrive for my current labtop (not yet)
9) clear belongings at work station in school (slowly day by day)
10) mission (go with the flow)
11) training for shape run (on hold)
12) volunteering (when i have the time)
13) aaron kwok concert (might go might not go)
14) To improve Nana's grade for maths and english
"Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again : Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:4-7
Amen!!
